Clancy, Jennifer, Mom and I all had a wee pow-wow at her apartment yesterday morning while Dan and Sarah DillonYork took the kids to the playground. I don't know that we came to a decision of any sort, but we came up with more questions. To me this feels like a decision that nobody outside of the medical world should be faced with, but I guess it's just the situation and there's nothing to be done. It will of course ultimately be Mom's decision, so we'll see. We're pretty certain that Dr. P will push for at least one more round of chemo.
I feel like it's been an eternity since I've strongly thought about things like "what am I doing with my life" and "why aren't I in this place or that place". All of that stuff is in some sort of pale out of focus shade right now, but it still somehow hovers in the background. Everyone tells me it's important to live my life and still focus on fun things, good things, other things than cancer, but it's really hard. The "my actual life" part is the hardest thing - funny eh? I thought the day-to-day thing with Mom would be the hardest, but taking care of Mom and being there for her actually feels like something I was born to do.
Some good news today: my friends (and Mom's) Alan Ferber (trombone), Tim Albright (trombone) and Dave Smith (trumpet) are all coming over to Mom's to play some music for her this evening. There may even be a bass player! She's so excited. It's going to do all of us a world of good I think - but especially Mom.
6 comments:
Hi Sarah:
Where you are is the right place. There for your Mom...Giving your love for whatever or whoever in the present is the right place for anyone...And yes the music is a great idea...Janet loves music especially when you and your friends are jammin for her...I'm glad she is hydrating and comfortable and has her loving family around her. I love and miss you guys. Take care and my love to you all.
Bern
Oh I just think that's fantastic! I'm serious -- nothing can make a body feel better like live music can. Janet, everyone, I wish Bill & I weren't so far away across the continent in SF so we could hug you all. We love you & think good thoughts for you every day. Thank you so much for this blog. Janet, I begin teaching screenwriting today -- Dan Carbone had to drop out and they tapped me. 2 days to prepare! Excited though. Haven't found the book you told me about...but love you anyway. So there.
hi sarah!
I am thrilled to hear that you are having a private concert for our Janet! What a great idea!
Please pass on my love to her and tell her I am having the time of my life bringing Shakespeare and poetry to the next generation of kids in upstate New York. The response we are receiving is phenomenal. I take Janet and her love of words and theater out there on stage with me every day.
I'm thinking of Janet and YOU and everyone taking such good care of her and wishing I was there.
Please take care of yourself!
All my love,
Brian
917 554 4040
Hiya ... I'm a friend of Jennifer's and have been following the posts here, sending all the best vibes I can.
One family "recipe" we have for quelling nausea and keeping stuff down is barley broth. take a cup of barley and lots of water and boil for say, 20 mins. strain off the barley, add a little salt to the water, and sip in small amts. It seems to coat the stomach and soothe it.
So glad she's holding down the natural electrolytes, so much better than Gatorade for the bod. Tastier, too. :)
Hoping for rest and healing and... all the best for all of you.
love,
~anastasia
Hello Dearest Janet:
I just want you to know that i am thinking good positive thoughts about you. You are incredible! Don't ever forget it. I was very influenced by you lady. Their is only one woman like you. You were strong for me when i needed help and encouragement. So now, it's your turn to know how much you are loved and if i can do anything please call me. A big warm embrace to you and your family.
Love and Strength to you ~~~~~
Danette
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